Hi Lulu,
Maybe the first thing to do would be to establish what you'd like to work on first. Would you like to work on your relationship issues, your guilt, your anxiety, or the feeling of disconnection from yourself? A few of them will probably be inter-connected - however, being specific about what you want to change is a good starting point.
You're probably correct about the psychological reversal thing. Any time you use EFT and an issue doesn't seem to budge, try to look for reasons why you may subconsciously not want the issue to shift. For example, you may not feel deserving of the change, or you may feel you'll hurt somebody if you change (maybe this is what you're experiencing towards your father, in relation to men).
If you're having trouble assessing your SUDs level, maybe you can try looking at the beliefs behind the event, and assess how true they feel for you before and after tapping. Another thing you can do is play a movie of the event, and notice how the details of the movie change as you keep tapping.
I read an article recently which suggested that if you're experiencing unexplained resistance towards tapping on a particular issue, it may mean your subconscious knows what's coming up, and is trying to protect you from intense memories and emotions. Maybe the next time you tap, you can explore this theme a bit.
Hopefully this helps you establish yourself a bit, and decide what you want to work on. Once you've made up your mind, drop us a post, and we'll see how we can help :-)