Hello I have posted here before and I have been using EFT for a while on myself and with my husband with some sucess - mainly I have to say for emotional rather than physical issues. We live in India and there are no EFT therapists that we know of in our state. My husbands cousin has a problem which I feel may be benefited with EFT but we are not experts and would welcome help on how to get going with this. As the cousin only speaks our local language my husband will have to help him with the EFT but he is not too sure where to start as he only has a basic knowledge of EFT.

The problem is that when the cousin travels anywhere he feels like he has to go to the toilet alot (bowel movement), so he is fearing to travel or go to any party or funcion - he wont be comfortable. From home also he isn't comfortable sometimes - he will go but then immediatley feel like he has to go again. For 20 years he's had this problem . He has had medical check ups which are normal and he doesnt have any pain, he saw a psychiatrist for some time  - the medicines he was given ( I dont know what) did help but he doesnt want to keep taking them and the talk therapy didnt help. It seems like the problem is controlling his life.

I dont know if there is a physical causative factor (diet etc. ) that may be contributing to this but there is also a sure mental factor in that it is causing him a lot of tension and worry.

We are thinking in the next couple of weeks to start the tapping so if anyone can give guidelines (quite simple would be better as he will not understand very complex processes) about how to start with this and what to tap on , that would be great!! I would love for him to get relief as locally there doesnt seem to be any kind of treatment to help him.

Many thanks - Mere

 Hi Mere,

You can approach the problem in many different ways. Here are a few suggestions: 

1 ) One of the things your husband's cousin can do for himself now is just tap whenever he feels the anxiety coming on. For example, if he is about to make a trip, he might start feeling anxious or worried about the issue. He can start tapping then. 

Then he can tap when he's actually doing the travelling, on any anxious thoughts, and on any physical sensations (as in, needing to use the bathroom).

2 ) Another thing that would be useful to him would be to ask himself how he feels about his condition. Sometimes when we've had a chronic embarrassing problem, we tend to beat ourselves up about it. He can use tapping phrases like the following to feel better about his situation, and to be more forgiving and loving towards himself. 

• Even though I've had this problem for 20 years now, and it makes me feel so (frustrated? embarassed? angry?) I love and forgive myself anyway
• Even though nothing I'm doing to help this problem is working, and I feel ready to give up, I love, accept and support myself
• Even if this problem never goes away, I'm willing to forgive and accept myself unconditionally

3 ) Communicating with one's body is also helpful. If the problem has an emotional or mental cause, chances are, his body is trying to tell him something, or pass a message, every time he experiences this problem. So maybe he could ask questions while tapping on himself, for example: 

• What is my body trying to tell me every time I feel this need to use the bathroom?
• What beliefs am I holding inside which make me feel this way, every time I travel? 
  

4 ) Perhaps the most useful thing he can do, however, is consider what was going on in his life 20 years ago, which is when you said the problem started. Perhaps he has no conscious recollection of the causing event, but he can use tapping phrases for what he does remember, in the hopes that he will gain more pieces of the puzzle. This can be a bit more complex, however, which is why I've mentioned it last.

I really hope these suggestions help you. You can pick one, or a few to work with, and see how you all go. All the best to you :-)

Thank you very much for the reply.That has given me some extra things to work with I hadn't thought of. I think I now have a lot of suggestions and materials to work with for the first session - my husband is going to study this over the weekend and hopefully we can do the tapping next week so I'll post the results...

warm wishes to all. 

WHEN I WAS IN ELEMENTRY, JOUNIOR HIGH AND HIGH SCHOOL THERE WAS A GROUP OF KIDS THAT THOUGHT IT WAS FUNNY TO ATTACK ME FROM BOTH SIDES AND TWO IN FRONT. THEY WOULD GRAB ME AND YANK ME OFF THE TOILET CALLING ME A SISSY FOR USING THE TOILETS AT SCHOOL.. THIS OCCOURED OVER TWENTY PLUS YEARS AGO. THE SAD PART IS WHEN I AM IN LARGE PUBLIC REST ROOM WITH THE NEED TO DO BUSINESS. IBECOME NERVIOUS THAT I WILL BE ATTACKED STILL TO THIS DAY. I AM NOW PHYSICALLY DISABLED FROM THOSE CHILDHOOD INJURIES. THE PTSD IS SO STRONG THAT SOMETIMES I MIGHT HAVE TO SIT ON THE TOILET FOR UPTO AN HOUR AND A HALF. I USE CATHETERS EVERY FOUR HOURS AND I STILL PANIC IF I HAVE TO USE A LARGE RESTROOM

Hello, I am sorry to hear about that difficulty keyrenausher but I'm sure that that is the type of issue which EFT could help a lot but it is probably a good idea to work with an experienced practitioner if at all possible.

To update on our cousins situation, we did one session - he remebered one incident which he thought may have been the cause but couldnt get any emotional intensity on it, but anyway they tapped some rounds on it. The rest was more general tapping and teaching him how to do it so he can tap at home. However unfortunately his mother had to go into hospital so we have been unable to do any more work on this or really find out if there has been a change.I did feel that he seemed happier and more relaxed after the session though.. 

 Hi Dobby,

I would second bumblebees advice to find a practitioner to work with. You need an outside person to help you get through the trauma.  Learn the tapping and do it regularly for smaller issues.  Especially the karate chop point.  But to make some progress with your toilet anxiety/trauma, I recommend a practitioner to save you years of difficulty.

Mildred

 Hey.

I had this very same problem a short while ago and managed to overcome it, I still feel like it sometimes when in a really stressfull situation but im 80% over it, Second to the EFT about Stress, Fear and Anxiety about always being at your best ready to fight at any time "No kidding" The main problem is that when we are going to fight we naturally want to fight are best so we use the toilet so we are lighter and can fight and run away more easy.

The biggest step of all though and is about 70% of the battle is not going with the urge and useing the Toilet again, Even if the urge is huge you just have to resist it and get on with what your doing, About 30 mins down the line the feeling will go away once you are distracted by other things.

Been there done it :)