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EFT was originally developed to reduce the therapy process from months/years down to minutes/hours. As emotional problems faded, both physical health and personal performance improved (often dramatically). As a result, EFT is spreading quickly among the healing community. It is an emotional version of acupressure wherein certain meridian release points are gently stimulated by tapping on them with the fingertips.







EFT Blog

A most important lesson

Sometimes we are so caught up in the everyday pursuits of life that we walk right by the loveliness that surrounds us.  All too often we take people for granted and that is a mistake.  This parable points to a lesson that we may have forgotten.

 

A Most Important Lesson

During my second month of nursing school, our professor gave us a pop quiz. I was a conscientious student and had breezed through the questions, until I read the last one: "What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?" Surely, this was some kind of joke.


I had seen the cleaning woman several times. She was tall, dark-haired and in her 50s, but how would I know her name? I handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank.


Just before class ended, one student asked if the last question would count toward our quiz grade. "Absolutely," said the professor. "In your careers, you will meet many people. All are significant. They deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say 'hello'."

I've never forgotten that lesson. I also learned her name was Dorothy.


Author Unknown

 

 

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Comments

 

Bess Milan said:

I think, after reading this, how sad.  We never know how unimportant the people we meet on the stree, those that serve us at the grocery or resturant may feel.  Just hearing their name can be uplifting and I will certainly try to do better.
Bess Milan  
January 28, 2007 6:04 PM
 

Elizabeth Fleming said:

Excellent story!!  I have a note on the edge of my computer screen that says, "Remember that everyone you meet wears an invisible sign.  It reads, 'Notice me.  Make me feel important.'"  Thank you, Gary, for the oh, so important reminder!
~Elizabeth~
January 28, 2007 6:09 PM
 

Hildy Lyn Roy, CMT/RP said:

Years ago I used to say,"I can't remember peoples names".   One day, I realized my name is important to me, therefore theirs is to them.    I made a point of focusing, and repeating their name back to them.    later, I would use association games to remember.   I have taught ballroom classes, fitness classes, Yoga classes, and so meet a lot of people.    Even going for my walks, a total "stranger" who lives on another street, but I will tell them "Hi, I'm Hildy, what's your name?"   I agree, we each one of us needs love, attention, a pat on the back, a hug and to remember our name.   "Hi, I'm Hildy, what's your name?"   Hugs and bhakti (love), Hildy.   P.S. I even want to know and remember their dog's name!!!!! Oh and I'm a Certified Massage Therapist and Reiki Practitioner......more people, more names.
January 28, 2007 6:51 PM
 

Catherine Peyton said:

I am a teacher and this struck a chord with me because we have a night custodian who talks with listens to everyone and he does his night rounds. When appropriate, often has wise things to offer to our tales of woe, or at least a sympathetic ear. Often he has a interesting story to tell that takes away the cares of the day.  One teacher called him " our philosopher janitor". I call him my friend Norm.
January 28, 2007 6:54 PM
 

D. A. Rimbold said:

“More valuable than treasures in a storehouse are treasures of the body, and the treasures of the heart are the most valuable of all. Strive to accumulate the treasures of the heart!” The Major Writings of Nichiren Daishonin   Life’s most important commodity—that which most greatly enhances the quality of our lives—is treasures of the heart.[excerpt from the article Treasures Of The Heart by Jeff Kriger in the magazine Living Buddhism ]
January 28, 2007 7:08 PM
 

Joerg Helms said:

The power of a brain is not only under control of its mass or number of braincells, but its connections (synapses) between the cells. I like to compare humankind to a super brain. Then each individual would be a like a brain cell, and synapses would translate into our ability to communicate with each other. I believe the more we increase the quality of our communications and the number of connections we make with our fellow beings, the more we raise the global intelligence and consciousness. Therefore let's talk...  silence is silver, speech is gold.... :o)
January 28, 2007 7:37 PM
 

Barry Lock said:

Since retiring I've started working part-time at an aged care facility. Three quarters of the dear folk there are suffering from various sorts of dementia and other serious disabilities. Quite a few of them just sit and stare at the walls with no sign of interest in anything around them. Many of them speak little or no English so conversation is difficult. I frequently pass a tiny frail little lady from Russia. She is nervous and suspicious of strangers. I usually give her a wave and a smile and if I'm
close enough I say hello. Her response has always been just a suspicious look, until
two days ago when she actually waved weakly back to me. What joy!!
January 28, 2007 9:11 PM
 

Pete said:

This is really a great story...I have found many times that the people that we sometimes think have the "least to offer" to our lives are usually the ones that we can learn the most from.  Everybody we come in contact with has a story and plays a small in our lives...

Good stuff!
January 28, 2007 9:37 PM
 

Janna said:

I teach in an inner city high school. I think that it goes even further than that story. Sometimes we don't know the power of our acknowledgement of that other human being, or the power of the respect we can give someone. Alot of time, especially with children, the ones who need our love the most act like they need/want it the least. I have found that true with my own children.
January 28, 2007 10:58 PM
 

helen said:

yes i find that acknowledgement of a stranger - maybe even just a glance in their direction, maybe a warm smile to someone you have never spoken to can shift both your world and theirs and then will have an ongoing positive ripple effect for others around.  
January 29, 2007 1:07 AM
 

Arnie Fufkin said:

I was the cleaner at Polymer Records recording studios for several years. I was always in awe of the big names who used to go there, and learnt rarely to meet anyone's eye, trying to be as inconspicuous as possible and keeping out of their way. There were however several very importanrt people who always took the time to say hello - Meatloaf always asked me how my wife Betty was doing, even though I hadn't seen him for months, and Diana Ross used to get me a cup of coffee and help finish off the sweeping, if it had been a particularly protracted recording session. She'd say, "Arnie, just because I earn more in an hour than you will in a year, it doesn't mean to say we aren't all equal in the eyes of God." Little things like that really made a difference.
January 29, 2007 2:15 AM
 

Dana Mills said:

What a moving story! It reminded me of a scientist I used to work with. She was hired as a chemist in Ottawa, Canadian Mint.  During an orientation, along with another few  PhD scientist their boss introduced them to a man who cleaned the floors. He later told them that he wants them to treat that cleaner with the same respect that they would treat him; each one of them was equally important.  I do apologize if I had forgotten the exact words, it was some 20 years ago, but I will never forget the meaning of his words.
January 29, 2007 2:41 AM
 

nick cercone said:

SO great, so important...it should  be required reading for the world.
January 29, 2007 2:49 AM
 

anthony myura said:

Hi,
I ordered the $99 EFT package over two weeks age. Just inquiring to check status.
anthony myura
169 seaview ave
palm beach, fl 33480
561-832-4412
tonym@turnkeyrealty.net

thanks
Tony
January 29, 2007 3:19 AM
 

Susan Palumbo said:

There is a scripture in the bible that goes something like...Be careful how you treat people because  sometimes they are angels even though one is not aware of it.   I try t o go through my day with that in my mind.  
January 29, 2007 3:21 AM
 

Shoshana Bregman said:

Absolute synchronicity for me!    Today I used a taxi twice and made a decision to have a conversation with my drivers.   I have to admit, I didn't ask their names.   I am now in process of reaching out to others regardless, without thinking at all about what I might get back.  What goes around comes around anyway, one way or another.   And today I suddenly found myself, while I was driving, blessing the car and driver behind me for keeping a safe distance from me, and he really drew back ( you should know, I live in Israel, where road manners..... left blank on purpose)   And I'm using EFT regularly whenever something comes up and have just had a major breakthrough in connection with anger.  Thank you, Gary, for giving a method which enables people to take responsibility for themselves.
January 29, 2007 3:57 AM
 

Amy Carnegie said:

When I was in my early twenties, I was in a line when I heard the woman in front of me speak.  She had an accent I wasn't familiar with, and I thought it was so beautiful...so I told her!  She looked at me with an odd look in her eyes (almost teary) and said, "Thank you!  My day has been so awful, I needed to hear something nice!"  I realized then that we all need to hear 'something' nice and what we think may be a small thing can end up making a huge difference in someones day!  Since then, I have tried to do that for all the people I meet in my day...then we all feel good!
January 29, 2007 5:27 AM
 

susan moodie said:

this has realy made me think...I am awful at names.....but that is no excuse, am going to have to learn a way of remembering them.....I don't know even the names of the so called' important ones'.................would love some advise as determined to change........life would be so less confusing and gossip might mean some thing......
January 29, 2007 5:31 AM
 

Damodar Lalla said:

Do we know the name of Liftman of our building or even we dont know the name of watchman. They salute or say Hello daily in the morning, but do not recognise their greeting. We are already thinking about our problems. How our day will pass. We are self centered and see a man or meet him only when we have got some work in him. How selfish we are. Do we know the names of our neighbours? May be or may not. Let us all resolve that we will look around and recognise people and appreciate their work, small or big. Try to bring smiles on their faces or present a flower as a token of love and appreciation. Thanks
January 29, 2007
January 29, 2007 5:47 AM
 

mary said:

I have lived in the country, where most drivers wave to other drivers in a friendly way,  even if they are strangers.  I stayed in a city for a while and I would wave to drivers, but they wouldn't wave back.  I thought "How come they aren't friendly?"  People need each other.   Even a smile can do alot.
January 29, 2007 6:10 AM
 

Paula, Nottingham England said:

I soooo agree with this; it was something my beloved Grandfather told me years ago. You never know where the Angels are!! Doing my level 2 EFT this week - cannot wait pass on this wonderful knowledge to everyone I know.
January 29, 2007 6:46 AM
 

Corinne JUDAH said:

So very true.
I must change some habitual omissions.
January 29, 2007 6:50 AM
 

Mike Hoffman said:

The Look

Our eyes meet, for an instant
I know
You know
Yet, I don't know you
You don't know me
Yet, we know, each of us
For an instant.

Passing each other
We'll probably never
See  each other again
But a glimpse of human-ness
A momentary enclave
Through the crack, that is
Beyond any words.

January 29, 2007 7:03 AM
 

Virginia Stutesman said:

Just like the one True God Jehovah has a name, we all like to be called by our name. There is wonderful power by using the name of the person we are talking to.
January 29, 2007 7:24 AM
 

Randall Harman said:

It is truly a most important lession for all of us to actively employ.  I've taken to the habit of noting--and using--the names listed on the tags of service people I encounter.  The look of suprise --and pleasure--are a joy to behold.
January 29, 2007 7:32 AM
 

Barbara Krisfalusy said:

Such a simple truth, with such a broad impact - on both the giver and the receiver - I instantly fall in love with anyone I see talking with someone "beneath" him (in so-called society's eyes) - the cleaning person, the parking lot attendant, etc., the cashier - oh if we all could only realize and be aware of what a impact a simple smile or hello means - for surely I know what it means to me !!  
January 29, 2007 7:34 AM
 

Sean LeMay said:

Hey Gary,

I like the story.  And, if true, would like to acknowledge the teacher.

And we should certainly practice this in our own lives regardless of motivation.

However it got me to thinking, why does everything we do require a reward?

The students began to recognize people as important...but because it affected their grades.  We get these little merit badges, called degrees, because we performed some trick to impress someone else.

Wouldn't it be nice if it was taught to us, perhaps by our parents, as being a "natural" thing to do as we journey through this life on this earth plain?

Just thinking out loud..

Sean LeMay,
MBA, BBA, CHT, NLP Master, alphabet soup....big deal!
Results count...accreditations don't

slemay@wightman.ca

January 29, 2007 7:58 AM
 

Frank Avitt said:

Gary,  
I respect you more than any teacher I have ever had.  It has been a privilege to have this experience.
Thanks.
January 29, 2007 10:29 AM
 

Peggy Baden said:

This message has a vital human quality that we by pass in this quick fast paced road of life.  I teach nursing school and this story will be shared with my student nurses. Maybe even a test question, too.  Thank you!
January 29, 2007 11:38 AM
 

Ken Cornell said:

I am thankful, that I have slowed down in this frantic pace they call life today. I find it a two way street by saying hello and how are you to the people I meet rather I know them or not. One never knows it very well could be your very last greeting.
January 29, 2007 12:28 PM
 

Frank Walmsley NZ said:

I live in a town (Oamaru) with only 13 or so thousand people in it , My wife and i cannot walk through the town  on a thursday to Sunday with out seeing someone we know and  we all acknowledge each other  , some will honk a horn and wave and we cannot even see who is driving ,others just smile and nod as we pass , However the overall feeling we get is just wonderfull and now we see our children (grown) having the same problem (said with a hint of sarcasm), One moment it will be the town Mayor and or his wife or the cutter sweeper ,none seem to be above just saying Hi and giving a smile ,So to all you out there ,give it ago you just might make someones Day ! Blessings to you all Frank (heres a smile) :-)
January 29, 2007 2:53 PM
 

DODODODODODOD said:

ITS long but cool and important WE LOVE IT!!!!
January 29, 2007 3:23 PM
 

Dolphine said:

I really considered it and now Im slowing down my life to look for all the good things! GO whoever wrote this!!!!
January 29, 2007 3:25 PM
 

Ima Rockstar said:

Important and GREAT YOU ROCK
January 29, 2007 3:27 PM
 

kldgsvklno;klnfv said:

xdckjnbkjlbdsfv
January 29, 2007 3:28 PM
 

Louise said:

The truth is if we don't pay attention to others they won't pay attention to us.  Our name is so sweet to us, walk a mile in the shoes of the person you do not know, Ask their name and you may find their shoes are a great place to be.
January 29, 2007 5:31 PM
 

miguel angel said:

una leccion importante, hacer protagonistas toda persona que se encuentra a nuestro alrededor...
January 29, 2007 8:19 PM
 

tannum@bigpond.net.au said:

I have always believed this and I talk to people at random in lines and smile at people when I approach them- most times a smile is the response. I stop if someone has a problem - ie falls over, or is visiblylost.  I don't have to think I just do it. It's not sweet or good or wonderful it just has to be done.

PS - it gives you a good feeling even if no one notices
January 30, 2007 1:52 AM
 

Barry Wom said:

I was deeply moved when I read Mr. Fufkins remarks.
I used to play in a popular beat combo in the 60's and on many occassions found myself passing through and sometimes out in the Polymer Records building.
I do recall through the heady haze of those sessions a small man with a broom and an oversized moustache.
Me and the rest of the band would often make fun of this man and taunt him in an un-dignified manner....Arnie if you are out there, I appologise, the floors to studio one were squeeky clean (infact if you listen hard you can hear them on some of our vinyl recordings).
It just goes to show, that sometimes its the little guys who make the most noise.
January 30, 2007 4:51 AM
 

Lex Arlington of Mooney Ponds, Wisconsin said:

I have tried saying hi to folks - walking up to them at ATM machines, in shopping mall car parks , striking up a conversation in clothing store changing rooms, and even smiling at guys next to me at the john - but I rarely get a smile back. In fact they often turn and walk or run the other way. I guess it's just a mark of how paranoid our society has become these days, not to give an old timer like me the time of day.
January 30, 2007 5:27 AM
 

Twinkles O'Hanrahan said:

We should try to notice everyone in the course of our day - we never know who might be an angel in disguise.
January 30, 2007 5:59 AM
 

audrey said:

I think that too many of you are thinking how good you are to speak to those you see as 'lower' than yoursleves. It would be much better if you just spoke to other people never mind what position they hold in the workforce. You think that speaking to those 'lower ' than yourselves lightens their day - have you thought that maybe they have to pretend to be nice to you otherwise you will complain about them and their precarious position could easily be lost if you complain. Be nice to others because you are nice not for the good feeling it might give you
January 30, 2007 6:31 AM
 

Freddy Mullard said:

Well said Audrey - some patronising goody two shoe Church goer comments here got on my goat too - better to say nothing if your spirit doesn't move you to do it sincerely.
January 30, 2007 6:40 AM
 

Emma MacKenzie said:

There came a moment in my life when I stopped being so concerned about me, me, me and I began to truly interact with everyone I met.  I chat with the checkout boy at the grocery store and have followed him from high school to community college, I know the people at the cafeteria of my work place who do the dishes and cook the food, I sit and eat lunch with professors and secretaries and housecleaners - each of the people in my life contribute so much to me, and I love being able to acknowledge each of them.  Try it and see!  Each time you interact with a stranger, find one thing you enjoy about them - a smile, a necklace, a neat belt - and tell them!  It makes their day and it will make yours too!
January 30, 2007 8:30 AM
 

Lex Arlington said:

I told Shelley at the minimart she had great jugs, and that it had made my day, but I don't think she was that ripped about it.
January 30, 2007 10:22 AM
 

Random Gadget said:

I once spent a semester with the word YES written on my forehead in green marker pen. Because it said something positive, the responses I got from strangers were all positive too. Plenty of folk were smiling at me wherever I went. It was cool.
January 30, 2007 10:28 AM
 

Jebus Doolittle, Utah said:

Marker pen is toxic - there are far less dangerous ways of reaching out to strangers, and I would ask everyone not to condone this kind of behaviour.
January 30, 2007 10:32 AM
 

shafiyah elishevah said:

darshan Singh said: every single person with whom you come in contact is your Teacher. when i first read that, i felt so "superior" to everyone (really so afraid of them) that i couldn't even take it in.
Deepak Chopra says that he is so used to blessed synchronicities that he is fully expecting his seatmate on the plane to provide the missing link, or the apt teaching, for his needs of the moment.
I like to practice this with my Customer Service Representatives. I usually have a notepaper in front of me anyway, so it's easy to write his or her name down to refer to. Also they almost always say it at the beginning, so you don't even have to ask for it! Many times in this context you do have to ask him or her to repeat the name, because it gets lost in the how can i help you script.
Pay attention to how you say your name. If you mumble or slur it, you might consider practicing it, saying it out loud to yourself. An actress friend of mine found that her voice and self-image and throat chakra issues all resolved after this practice.
om shanti
January 30, 2007 12:18 PM
 

Linda B-H (Louisville, Colorado, USA) said:

I agree with what others have said and I would add it is equally important to remember to always speak kindly and respectfully, as well as be thoughtful to,  and treat your family with dignity, integrity, and respect. They, too, could be Angels in disguise, and/or Teachers and you may not know it.

Too often, people take those closest to them for granted and don't appreciate what they have until it is too late ~~ until they are gone through death, accident, illness, divorce, etc.  Think about it!  Life is too short.

How many times have you said "I'm too, busy" or "I don't have time" or "Later" and before you know it, it really is too late and then there is nothing left, but regrets???

Priorities in todays society are really very skewed.  In reality, we really don't have the luxury of not making or taking the time.  Think about how selfish it is, and how destructive to society, ultimately, to not do so!!
January 30, 2007 4:27 PM
 

Brian Shakti Van Warmer (Maryland US) said:

In my practice as a holistic plumber I am blessed with an opportunity to come into people's homes and help fix up their leaky pipes. I say in my head 'bless you' as I'm doing the work, and find that this has a profound effect upon the quality of our interaction, even when i've got my head stuck under their kitchen sink. I leave people feeling good , their energies raised up and their chakras as well as their plumbing unblocked. Just wanted to say - it's not only what we say, it's what we think too that matters. What we think is communicated anyway through our eye contact and body language - folks intuitively listen to these things more than to the words we say. Bless YOU.
January 31, 2007 3:31 AM
 

Rolf Harris said:

What an inspiring tale this was - thanks for reminding us what's important in these all too busy days.
January 31, 2007 3:38 AM
 

Richard E. Levine said:

I have shown some people in my church who jumped to the conclusion that EFT ws a cult spewing dvds, books tapes classes etc. to spread the devil evile. i wish we had a well known pastor who uses it for counseling his people.
January 31, 2007 4:00 AM
 

Briony Swedgett - Sleepy Hollows Healing Centre said:

I used EFT with a work colleague who is at her wits end with insomnia. She was really tearful at the start and rated her frustration as a 9. As we went through the tapping sequence she started to smile - maybe at the seemingly ridiculous things I was asking her to do and to say. By the time we got to the end she was clearly in a different space, but was somehow not ready to acknowledge that it had really been that simple. She told me that it had not helped, and chose to retreat back to her familiar and safe space of feeling overwhelmed and frustrated. Maybe we need to check for secondary gain when we're doing EFT with people, who don't really want to give up their problems. Anyone else find this?
January 31, 2007 5:09 AM
 

Victor said:

This story truly touched everyone who responded. I would like to thank you for your comments and reminding me what it is all about.  "LOVE"
                                                                 
February 1, 2007 4:09 AM
 

pawnee@team-national.com said:

"Love is all you need".... as the John Lennon song says.... well..... that and EFT,
with love,Pawnee
February 1, 2007 10:07 AM
 

Bruce Wangahara, Seattle said:

I've been using the Nautilus Combine for several weeks now, and can really feel the benefit - combining it with EFT tapping - I feel like about 20 years younger. How are others getting on?
February 2, 2007 2:33 AM
 

Laurent Sirois said:

I just read all the responses and am in awe for the power of our name, yes this really struck a cord in my life. Thank you Gary for your words of wisdom. I do a lot of smiling to people and feel blessed for my life. This morning at church I met a woman with lung cancer that could hardly breathe and after a round of EFT just felt the difference. She is due to see her doctor tomorrow and start chemo so we did another round and felt calmer about that. I feel blessed to have this tool and use it everyday for myself and others.
Thank you again

Love and light
Laurent
February 4, 2007 1:05 PM
 

Ann said:

About Richard E. Levine's remark....some people in my church jumped to the conclusion that EFT is a cult spewing dvd's, books, tapes, classes to spread the devil evile...

It is very common that Christians being very afraid of the devil, of Satan, of the emotionally turmoiled archangel Luzifer and also feel in reality very ignorant about the true reality of the devil, that they call and name what are all precious, precious gifts and tools from God, as cults.

I just would like to mention that if emotionally turmoiled and jeoulous Luzifer had know and applied EFT, he didn't have to, in his rage and anger to God, find his ways to separate human beings from the all fullfilling love of God.
February 9, 2007 2:10 AM
 

Ruskin said:

Today I was not having a good morning. I had not done my meditation, prayer, and EFT this morning, as I usually do. Then I hit one traffic jam after another and was running late. As I was walking from my car to my office, I passed a guy on the sidewalk. I was in a foul mood, so I didn't look up, smile, or say good morning--which I usually do in this small, friendly town. A few feet down the path, I stumbled and fell right on my face. The guy came to check on me and make sure I was OK. When I told him I was OK and thanked him, he said, "Take it easy, man. You've got a long way to go yet to get through the day." He had a very benevolent, understanding look on his face, as though he knew I was in trouble. Like the face of an angel. Then he walked away. . . I took his advice and did some EFt the first chance I got this morning. I feel better now.
February 20, 2007 12:41 PM
 

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April 1, 2007 6:46 PM
 

... said:

9 su 10! Ottenerlo! Siete buoni!
April 7, 2007 9:30 PM
 

... said:

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April 8, 2007 4:41 PM
 

... said:

Interessieren. SEHR interessant! ;)
April 9, 2007 10:27 PM
 

... said:

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April 10, 2007 3:18 AM
 

... said:

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